Brecking wall

Don’t you ever say I just walked away I will always want you

Some paths switch back true north and leave a clearer set of markings, while a few tangles remain to distract and hinder.
Those things belonged to me, and I wanted, demanded them. Of any obligations, you’d certainly come through on those, surely you would because there was some inherent goodness in you I’d fatally believed.
And without your poison to string me out, leave me gasping and dizzily searching an escape, I had to locate others.
And none compare. No oil and grime and dirt I could ever hope to consume would provide the quality injury I sought.
It wasn’t always about that ragged edge either. At least I long believed that. Now it embarrasses me to admit I could have been even more hopeless than I’d imagined at the beginning. Was that really what it was, you only kept me to conquer so long as I let you have that power, and as I slowly took it back you couldn’t stand what you had done, what it had forced me to become?

Why bother ever expressing patience or kindness to me then. If you aren’t genuinely just the monster you’ve promised, then is that your one last gesture to me, knowing how awfully you fucked everything up?

Why can’t I greet the day and think of you peacefully, instead of with my bitter, broken heart?